Frequently Asked Questions
Who is this website for?
What do you mean by Christian?
I don’t think x member is a Christian – what should I do?
I have met member x and they bear no relation to their online profile – what should I do?
How does the service work?
What else do you provide on this site?
Do I have to be a certain age to register/join?
Do I have to be a Christian to join this site?
Do you ever refuse or terminate membership?
What happens to my membership after it expires?
How do I cancel my membership
I’ve registered but I still can’t log on – what should I do?
How is my ‘% profile complete’ calculated?
How do I get my profile to the top of other people's search results?
How is my compatibility with other members calculated?
How does the rating on each of the My criteria questions work?
What happens when I use the Report function?
I added someone to my ‘Yes’/’No’/’Maybe’/’Favourite’/’Seen’ box and I can no longer find them there. What’s happened?
Someone was in ‘My Friends’ box but is no longer there – what’s happened?
I have clicked on an image of someone in my Mailbox/Contacts list but can no longer access their details. Why is this?
What is the criteria for the drop down menu of contacts in My inbox?
How does ‘Ask X to be your friend work’?
How do I find out if someone has requested to be my friend and how do I accept or decline?
What happens when I block someone?
Why does the keyword search bring up profiles without the keyword in their profile?
How do I report an email?
If I delete an email can you retrieve it for me?
I had correspondence from someone but I can't access their profile now. Why?
Can I block email from a certain member?
How can I be sure an email I have sent has gone?
I've had an email saying I have mail but when I log in there is no mail there. Why is this?
Do I have to complete all the questions in my profile?
Should I change my profile from time to time?
Should I include a photograph in my profile?
How do I include a photograph in my profile?
Why can’t I include personal contact information in my profile?
Can I change the criteria I have set?
How can I check how my profile looks and ensure it’s viewable by others?
Is it safe to use a service like this?
Are my personal details secure?
How do people contact me if they don't have my address?
How can I protect my identity?
Is it safe to list a town for the Google map reference?
Do you pass any of my details to third parties?
The service provided by this website is specifically and exclusively for Christians who want to meet other Christians. Registration and membership is only open to Christians. This ensures that when people meet each other, they know that they will share their Christian faith in common. There are many other websites where people can meet others who are not specifically Christian, but this website has Christianity at its core.
Our service is
a) a friendship-finding service so it is open to all Christians whatever their marital status i.e. single – never married; widowed, divorced, separated, married. It is also
b) a relationship-finding (dating) service and for this purpose people who are married are unable to search for dating/romance/marriage relationships.
We understand Christian to mean people who believe in Jesus Christ as Lord and Saviour and who generally associate themselves with mainline Christian denominations. These include:
· Church of England, Church in
· Church of Scotland and other Presbyterian traditions
· Roman Catholics
· United Reformed Churches
· Pentecostal Churches
· Orthodox Churches including Russian and Greek
· Independent Churches including Evangelical and Charismatic churches.
If you are unsure whether your Christian faith is included within these Christian denominations please contact us to check.
We do not include:
· Jehovah’s Witnesses
· Unification Churches
We hope you will contact and meet many people through this site. If you genuinely believe someone is not a Christian and should not be on the site, then please contact us. However please remember that faith is a growing and active thing and not everyone will necessarily share the same views or even beliefs as you, nor will they be at the same point of their faith journey as you. This does not necessarily make them unsuitable as a member of the site.
This site is exclusively for Christians so if you come across someone who is blatantly not a Christian, please report them. However before you do please consider the following:
· Just because someone is not of the same denomination as you does not make them not a Christian
· Just because someone does not share your particular religious views, or strength of conviction, or understanding of the Bible (in its entirety or particular parts/verses) does not make them not a Christian
· Just because someone does things (or doesn’t do certain things) that you do, doesn’t make them not a Christian.
Ultimately we are not to judge others and this includes their faith, but if after considering these points, you still have concerns about the validity of another member’s faith, please do report the member concerned to us.
Firstly we trust this will be extremely rare. However the best way to prevent it happening is for you to tell us. Send us an email with your reasons and we'll do something about it. This site is run by fellow Christians and it's only by your feedback that we can mainain the integrity of our membership. Just because this organisation is online, doesn't mean that people can say things about themselves that aren't correct. People who do that soon get found out and soon find they are wasting their time.
The service this website provides is easy, simple and effective. You can start by using our sophisticated searching options to find the sort of people you’d like to get in contact with or you can register and add your own details so that other people can find and contact you. Once you have found someone’s details you can click on their name or photograph to find out much more about them. If you have completed your own criteria (My Criteria) you can also see how compatible you are with this person across different areas of your life. At any time you’ll be able to email them using our internal email system (Your own personal Inbox). When they reply to you, you’ll be able to follow the conversation you have with them easily with our state of the art system. When you are ready to get in touch with someone by telephone or by meeting, you’ll be able to suggest this to them through the internal mail system.
Although you are entirely free to contact any/all of the members on the site, our criteria section (My criteria) enables you to define the sort of person you’d like to find on the site and makes searching through all the users much easier. Once you have completed your criteria, you’ll then be able to see which users most closely match your criteria. You are completely in control of this and it’s a great feature which enables you to find people according to the things that are most important to you. Once you have completed this section, you can also search for people who match your criteria making finding the people you are looking for really easy.
Our site has some great social networking functions so you can keep in touch with friends – whether by email or chat. You can also use our forums to air your views, and manage your time using our calendar to keep your social life (and your friends) up to date.
You must be aged 18 or over to use our service. There is no upper age limit to our service and many people in all age groups find success through contacting each other through the internet. Some people think that the internet is just for young people in their 20s and 30s but people in their 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s and even 90s can be equally successful in finding new friends online.
Yes this site is exclusively for the use of Christians. You can read more about our definition of this by clicking here.
Membership is entirely at our discretion and on rare occasions we may refuse or terminate membership. We would do this if we have reason to believe that someone’s behaviour on or off the site is undesirable or if a member has failed to comply with our Terms and Conditions/House Rules which are in place to protect all members and ensure as far as is reasonably possible that we provide a safe and secure environment for all our users.
When your membership expires all your details will be taken off our site and no-one will be able to find you on the site.
You can terminate your membership at any time by clicking on the My Account page and choosing the option to cancel your membership.
When you register with us, you choose a user name and password. You need both of these to log on. Make sure you are entering them correctly (your username is not case sensitive but your password is) - if you still can’t log on, then use our ‘Forgotten username/password’ link to have them emailed to you.
Each part of your profile questionnaire contributes to the percentage complete. All the fast profile questions come from other sections, so if you complete all of these and nothing else, your profile will show as 18% complete. As you compete the others sections in full i.e. ‘Personal details’, ‘My Life’, ‘My Interests’, ‘My spirituality’, ‘My Criteria’, and ‘More about me’ you will see that the percentage complete figure on your profile rises until, if you have answered every question, and added a photograph of yourself, you will have a 100% complete profile. The free text boxes under some of our questions don’t count towards your percentage complete – although they do obviously give others more information about you if you choose to fill them in.
The best way to get your profile to the top of the search results (assuming you fit what the other person is searching for) is to have a high percentage profile complete. So make sure you complete as many questions as you can and have added a photograph - as many people will only search for people who have photograph.The higher your percentage profile complete is, the higher up the search results you'll come and this is likely to mean that you get more people looking at your profile.
We use the answers to the questions in the ‘My criteria’ section, alongside the rating/importance you give to each question, to assess your compatibility with other members on the site, based on the answers they have given to the criteria that are important to you.
Each question within the ‘My Criteria’ section has an option to be rated from 1 to 5. If you rate a question as 1 it means that finding someone with this criteria is not particularly important to you. However if you rate it 5 it means it’s absolutely essential for you.
For example if you answered the question ‘The person I’d like to meet would have: hair colour - black; and rated it 1, then you’d be saying that you’d like someone with black hair but this isn’t very important to you. However if you rated this question 5, you’d be saying that it was absolutely essential that a perfect match for you would have black hair. This will affect how compatible other users are.
When you use this function to report someone else’s profile, behaviour or forum entry on the site an email is sent straight to the site administrators which includes the information you’ve written on your form, their username and your username. We will then follow up your concerns appropriately.
If you have Blocked this person when viewing their profile subsequently to adding them to one of your contact lists, the action of blocking them also removes them from your contact lists. If you want to add them to a list again, you need to unblock them first. Alternatively if the person concerned has blocked you or left the site, you will no longer see them in your Contacts box.
Either you have deleted them, or your friend has blocked your profile in which case they would have been deleted from your friends box. Alternatively the person may have found someone and decided to leave the site.
There are a number of reasons for this. Either the person concerned has left the site, or they have blocked you.
If you are sending an email using our email system, you will see a drop down list of people that you can add to your email. This list contains people who are in your 'friends' list. Your friends list is comprised of people who accepted your invitation to become a friend. You can invite people to be friends from their profile.
Your friends list is comprised of people who accepted your invitation to become a friend. You can invite people to be friends from their profile.
When you click on the ‘Ask x to be your friend’ link on their profile, your picture (which links to your profile) will appear in their friends box, with an option to Accept or Reject this request. If they accept it, you will be added to their friends box, and they will be added to yours. In addition you will both appear in drop down lists for sending emails and sharing events in your calendar. When you next look at their profile, you will be able to see that ‘X is your friend’.
In your ‘My Account’ tab, go to the section ‘My Contacts’ and within that you’ll find a tab for ‘Friends’. If you have a friend request, you’ll see it there as well as the link to Accept or Decline the request.
When you use the ‘Block profile’ link on someone’s profile and confirm you want to block this person they will no longer show up in your search results, and you will not be able to contact them in any way. If this person is in any of your contact lists they will be removed. The only place on our system you will then be able to find this person is in your ‘My contacts’ under No/Blocked. You can unblock them from here if you wish.
If you search on a keyword and it brings up a profile in which you can't find the keyword you'd searched on, then this keyword will be used in the person's 'My criteria' section. For example if you search on the word 'doctor', then you will get results for anyone who has included in their 'My criteria' that they want to meet someone who is a doctor as a profession.
If you have a problem with an email that another member has sent you then please report this member using the report button on their profile. You may wish to copy in the offending email. We do suggest you keep copies of emails that you are concerned about should you wish to contact us about them at any time in the future.
No, once you delete an email then it’s gone – if you think you might want an email in the future, then don’t delete it from your mail box.
The most likely reason for this is that this person has blocked you, or you have blocked them. If either of you have done that then although your previous emails to each other will show you will no longer be able to access their profile.
If you want to block email from a certain member, you must block them using the Block button on their profile. This will stop any correspondence from them from the point that you block them.
You can check in your 'Sent messages' folder and if your email has been sent, you will see it there. If you can’t see it then it did not get sent.
This happens because occasionally we get undesirable people on the site who email site members for other purposes than friendship and dating. When we discover this we ban them from the site and this has the effect of not enabling you to see their email any longer. However we are unable to retrieve the external email we've sent you telling you that you have mail, so you still get that email, only to log on and not find the email there.
In short No! but if you want to get the most from this site, then the more you complete the better.
Our profiles are probably the most comprehensive and informative of any you’ll find on the internet today, but as a result there are quite a lot of questions. However if you don’t want to complete them all you can complete the shortened version (under the Fast Profile tab) which enables to you get going quickly whilst giving others important information about yourself. When you have more time, you can then return and complete any or all of the other questions in the other sections.
There are many advantages to completing all our questions, including that other people will see that your profile is 100% complete which indicates very clearly that you are serious about finding new friends or relationships. You’re also more likely to get more contact from others when they know more about you. In addition the more complete your profile is, the higher up the page your profile will be displayed in our search results and therefore the more people who are likely to find you. Furthermore the more questions you answer the better our matching software will be in finding the right people for you and directing you to the right people.
We expect people to provide honest and accurate answers about themselves. However your circumstances or interests may change – or the emphasis you put on some things in your life may change, so it is a good idea to come back to your profile to review it from time to time.
YES! We would definitely recommend putting at least one good photograph of yourself on your profile. We all know that pictures can be misleading, so if you really want to give people a good idea of what you look like, we do suggest you add some further gallery pictures as well.
Your profile is much more likely to be considered by others if you they can see what you look like. If you do any research on dating and the internet you’ll quickly find that profiles with photographs are 15 times more likely to attract attention than those without photographs. This is true for Christians as well – so if you are looking to meet someone, give yourself the best chance by adding in a photograph. However do make sure it’s an up to date photo – there’s nothing worse that meeting someone and finding out they look totally different or 10 years older than their profile photograph.
Of course if you don’t want to put your picture on your profile, that’s absolutely fine – there’s plenty of other ways people will be able to find out about you. The choice is yours and the control is in your hands.
On the ‘My Account’ tab, go into the ‘My photos’ section. You will find clear and easy instructions on how to upload and label your photos.
You are free to amend your profile at any time and as many times as you like. It is important that you are happy with your profile and that it reflects the true you.
Can I change the criteria I have set?
You can change your criteria at any time. It is important that you consider your criteria carefully as it will affect who our system finds you compatible with. You may want to play with changing your criteria to see what difference it makes on your search results/compatibility.
You can view how your profile looks at any time by clicking on the ‘My Profile’ tab once you are logged in. This is how others will see it.
Is it safe to use a service like this?
There are risks to most things we do in life. And sadly this is occasionally the case when you connect and meet people through the internet. However ICN Dating has been designed with your safety and security in mind. Our Terms and Conditions lay out very clearly what is acceptable and unacceptable behaviour on the site. You can see an overview of these ‘rules’ here. ICN Dating can and will exclude anyone found contravening any of these Terms and Conditions. If you find a user you think should not be on the site, then please do let us know. If you meet someone from the site and find out that they have misrepresented themselves on the site, again please let us know. We take these matters very seriously and members feedback to us is what makes the site the place of integrity that it should be.
The site includes advice to ensure you minimise any risks there might be in contacting and meeting new people online. If you follow this advice there will be very little risk to your safety or privacy.
Yes we do. You can read it by clicking here.
Yes, your personal details, such as your postal and email address and telephone numbers which you give us on registration, are completely secure. They are collected for our use only and are NEVER NEVER given out to other members.
People are able to contact you via our internal mail system. You can collect your mail through clicking on your My Account tab and going to your Inbox. We never never give out your own personal email address. If you choose to give it to another member that is entirely up to you.
For some people who are working in high profile or particularly public jobs, protecting their identity is important. Although their full identity will be known to us, each member chooses a user name (that will not necessarily be their real name).
We ask you to select your nearest town to show your location on your profile and for our Google map reference. We specifically DO NOT use your postcode as this would identify to others your exact address. You can specify the nearest town to which you are comfortable being identified with.
ICN Dating is part of the The Christian Dating Parnership Ltd which is registered with the Office of the Data Protections Registrar. This organisation monitors how we use the information we hold about you. Your details are for the our use only and will not be given or sold to any other organisation without your permission.
Many dating sites online these days are syndicated to large organisations, that are often running a variety of dating networks – most of which are definitely not Christian. Bigchurch.com is one like this which although it appears to be for Christians, is not run by Christians or operated within God’s kingdom. For further details please see www.christiandatingwatchdog.com. ICN Dating has been designed and overseen by Christians from the outset, with over 10 years experience of bringing Christians together. Our technology and matching is at the forefront of what is possible on the internet today.
The best way to contact us is by email and by using our contact us form. Click here to use it now but please note you must be registered on the site to access this form.
Friendship and companionship is a basic human need. In the ‘old days’ the way people lived and their social structures were different and people generally found making new friends and finding life partners much easier than people do today. It’s no different for Christians – moreover it’s clear God intended mankind to be relational. For many Christians, finding a soul mate who shares their faith is important to them, but sometimes the avenues to find this soul mate can be limited. God sadly does not always drop our soul mate on to our laps, but often seems to expect us to look about, try different avenues and be proactive ourselves in our search.
Using a service such as ICN Dating gives Christians the opportunity to network with a huge number of people that they probably wouldn’t otherwise meet. Furthermore, with the information that our profiles provide, you can find out quite a lot about someone before you contact them, and when you do, be fairly sure that you are going to have the right things in common – be that your faith, your interests or something else that is important to you.